What did i learn ?

I have been trying to be a above average parent to my two boys while also making sure I focus on things I like to do as well.

So Vinh to all who already know is the most mischievious one of the house hold. He does not like rules, he does not like sitting in a single spot for more than a second, jumping is the best sport to him.. and this involves American ninja moves and jumps. (I can hear my mom laughing her lungs out..and enjoying)

As for Suriya who is a very sensitive and a very articulate young man tries to balance being a big brother and a regular little boy. He is interested in understanding, learning and listening to audio books.The best part is he likes movies like Willie Wonka and Chocolate Factory , Back to the Future slowly will show him Hairspray, Jurrasic Park and so on.

They are both super excited to go meet the family in India and ask me every day if its time to board the plane to India. I try to contain my excitement while answering their question every day. Daddy is getting used to demands of two little creatures asking a million questions while they try to play a single game of catch.

We have set our new year resolution to start exploring the beauty of the earth because not sure how long it is going to last. Yellowstone, Alaska, Mudumalai and everything that is still untouched. The boys love the outdoors and I believe as a part I should enable them to explore the nature and decide for themselves where to spend their time inside the house in front of a screen or outside another screen which is pristine.

The Big milestone…Miles to go before i sleep

Suriya turned 3 and Vinh is turning 1 ..I cannot believe that we are moving so fast. I do want to though share some of the things that unfolded a year ago to make myself feel better.

Vinh was born on a Sunday Feb 15 2015 and was whisked away from me almost immediatlely with a oxygen mask on. I thought this is just precautionary action to keep my baby comfortable.. and since giving birth at 9am i was exhausted at 11 am i realized my baby is still not back. So i hurried to the NICU just to notice he is fully wired with a oscillator helping him to breathe. Still I am dazed , lost , confused so thought everything will be fine. Then as i am walking out not knowing what to think I see three people walk towards me (supposedly to be on vacation) , Yes the usual suspects Uncle Minh , Tia Vero and Romina.  I told them Vinh is in NICU blah blah blah…but somehow felt better about them being there..

We were moved to Downey for additional care and then had recommended Children’s Hospital in case something become serious. Still as a mother who just gave birth i am trying to comprehend and literally understand what went so wrong. Then in Downey when Tri walked into my room and started crying i am like this is not good. If you guys all know about Tri he is not the guy who can easily show emotions but when he is crying i thought its not good. At the same time Suriya is asking when is baby coming home, my mom waiting to hear about her grandson. And Padma freaking out of the reality that is going on since she was in constant contact with us.

Uncle Minh is Vinh’s uncle a physician who knows how to be a uncle and physician at the same time. I do not know how he does but he does it, he explains Vinh’s condition but also explains how things will get better. I AM IN DEBT FOR MY LIFE for the night he spent with us fully knowing he has a full day shift the next day as a emergency care physician. He might see what he did as a small effort but to me its Herculean and I tear up as i right. And Tia vero taking Suriya out with the kid giving me and Tri the time to be with the baby. The reason I bring this up is I have it all pented up in my heart the situation where i was close losing my baby and was asked to pray.

We also were told he might need a lung by pass in order to save him, but he beat all odds and came out without any problem. Yes my Vinh is fighter and he has a purpose. And he gave me a purpose too more than making money for a living.

After this incident I realized how crazy it is as a mother to not feel anything when so much was unfolding. So everybody please take care of the moms postpartum is not simple not at all. Tri was right there with the baby everyday , every night telling him how much he loves him .. and I am sitting in a corner watching. I cannot believe to this moment i was not interested in showing how much I love.. maybe i was scared to attach myself.

ANBE SIVAM … Love is God.. I believe in it. .. And everybody’s love for me and Tri and Suriya bought Vinh back to me… The little fighter , fought his way back from the Abyss to a fully developed 1 year old baby today. I also had all the means to pay for all the high critical care needed , only to realize how about others who do not.

So i am joining March of Dimes and eventually will have my own way of helping babies who have will to fight but need the support economically. This is not doing it because it happened to Vinh .. this my way of giving back to all the nurses and doctors who treated Vinh as their kid and gave him back to me eventually.

Thank you Tri you are my rock , Uncle Min / Tia Vero (I am indebt for life) , Suriya (Who was good at home until we got baby home) , Padma (for making sure communication was handled well to avert unecessary stress and panic.

ANBE SIVAM…..

 

 

 

It has been a while !!!

Yes , busy busy busy !!!! Work , School , the boys feels like i have time booked for 24 hours. The boys are growing fast Suriya the big brother is sometimes nice , sometimes jealous all in one same time.

He talks a lot , like the other day we were in JCPenny and i was trying on clothes he tells me “Mommy try the pink one not the blue one” and then when i was looking for some intimates he says “Look mommy all your boobies are here” of course the store was laughing. Sometimes i forget he is a little kid yet to be 3 years old and expect a lot from him and then realize he is still a kid.

One thing for sure Vinh adores Suriya and vice versa is true. Hopefully the bond stays forever. When i started this blog i was determined that i will have only one kid so named it Suriya but now going to be “Chronicles of Suriya and Vinh”

Grandpa and Grandma were there for them to enjoy every minute of the day, they definitely miss the games, the walks, the laughs and so do we. Suriya cannot wait to see them again probably it might be in India next time.

Suriya has been growing leaps and bounds with his vocabulary the latest is “destroyed”. The school also has been phenomenal wondering if he should be there full time in the new year. Although vinh is growing up fast he is still a baby and i enjoy the attention from him.

Vinh had this first pumpkin patch with the grandpa and grandma and also will be his first thanksgiving and christmas. Pumpkin patch IMAG0447 20151103_064924 20151025_022100 20151025_022047

More to love….

So how is being a mother of two wonderful boys.. Let me be honest it is TOUGH !!! I struggle everyday to understand how should i feel or how am i doing when compared to others , however this little blog helps me reflect a lot of those things and give myself some of the answers i need.

Suriya indeed is growing to be a very intelligent young man who has a lot to say and ask (of course gets it from his dad). To be honest there are days when i am like really you know what you are asking ? Let me give an example he was seeing pictures on Facebook i posted years and years ago and came across my wedding pictures. He says “mommy you look like princess”  i mean the mix of happy feelings and overwhelming feeling of the fact my son is growing up put me in a shock. Then the other day he asks me “Mommy am i the love of your life ? ” And i supposedly the smart mouthed one (well ask my friends) said “of course you are there is no doubt” the followup question was “so how about baby?” One side i am proud that he is smart to articulate so well being as 2.5 year old but come on how am i going to keep up ?

He had no tears the first day at school and already made friends with Carrie and Ariel at least that is what he says to me. I am also seeing him grow into the big protective brother who was ready call 911 when somebody try to pick up the baby without my permission. He enjoys music top favourite “Vada Mapillai” a Vijay and Nayanthara dance number , Bruno Mars , Katie Perry followed by everything a toddler would like from Mickey to Thomas. He has a unique appreciation for music and the rhythm just moves him automatically.

I am going to have to wait and see what’s in store as he goes to school more…. Fingers crossed…

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Becoming Big Brother !!!

So finally my little Suri is a evolving into a big brother, everything changed the day Vinh was ready to come see the world.It was a roller coaster ride with him travelling between different NICU and we having to stay close to the new born. However the big brother held up really well even though he missed us a lot ..he was well behaved and understood we are busy. But one day i realized i had to spend time with my first born as well even though i am in crisis mode with the new born.   Suriya walks upto me and says “Mommy i am sad”, I was surprised i said “Why baby” his answer was clear ” because you are sad mommy and pyjanimals are sad”. Pyjanimals is show on sprout which helps kids learn about their feelings. I was shocked and i had to explain to him i was not sad i was just tired from giving birth to a new baby and he was in the hospital.

Even though it is extremely exhausting to be feeding a little baby 3 – 4 hours and also play with Suriya , i understood that a little time spent with him makes him more happy. Of course the tantrums have increased with him due to the new arrival but we are hanging in there since i do understand as a parent everything is a phase.

Tia Padma has become his best friend over night and Nanny Thu has being paying him full attention which is why he has not been a whole lot jealous about his younger brother , however i am still considered the “traitor” for moving on to a new baby 🙂

Tia Bebo , Uncle Minh had spent a whole day with Suriya and he had his first pepperoni pizza with Anoki, Sebastian and Romina. So hopefully more days like that will not only give me a break and more work of Tia Bebo but also it will be easy for him to transition to the school environment without mommy and daddy. Of course as always thank you Tia Bebo and Uncle Minh.

Even though i am in new mother’s bliss i am dreading the day going back to work , how are my little ones going to do ? Will there be a problem ? What am i supposed to if there is a problem ? How fast can i come home ? All these questions boggle my mind and keep me up at night.

So now i am starting to live the nightmares of the working mom ??? Hopefully i will figure a solution which would be helpful for my little ones and give me the peace of mind as well.

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